What should couples look for when committing to couples therapy? originally appeared on Quora, the place to gain and share knowledge, empowering people to learn from others and better understand the world.

I am a national psychologist and licensed (or license-pending) Marriage and Family Therapist (MFT) in over 10 states and have seen couples for relationship counseling for more than a decade. Choosing to see a therapist with your significant other in times of turmoil is a decision that could drastically improve and change both your relationship and life. Making that decision is not easy. You may feel anxious about what seeing a therapist may reveal about your relationship or about yourself. However, committing to couples therapy may inspire connection and rebuilding within your relationship that is difficult to do without a mediating, qualified third party.

Deciding whether or not to commit to couples therapy can be determined by the issues that exist within your relationship. If your relationship is experiencing any of these following issues, you may consider committing to couples therapy:

- Divorce or separation

- Breaches in trust (e.g., cheating)

- Issues with physical and emotional intimacy

- Major health conditions or life changes

- Abuse, control, or anger problems (If you are experiencing an abusive relationship, contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline (1.800.799.7233) or visit this website)

- Frequent arguments or difficulties with communication

- Conflicts with people at work or school

- Differences or adjustments in parenting styles

- Family stress related to boundaries and expectations

- Difficulty with keeping friends or making new ones

- Loneliness and isolation

- Fear of abandonment or rejection

In addition to identifying whether your issues warrant couples therapy or not, there are some life experiences that may call for guidance from a therapist. These include:

- Premarital counseling (discussion of children, the meaning of marriage, religion and traditions, expectations, money, etc.)

- Infertility

- Religious and cultural topics

- Phase of life difficulties

Knowing when to commit to couples therapy looks different for each couple. In deciding whether couples therapy is the right choice for you and your relationship, considering the benefits may make your decision easier.

On an individual level, your relationship counselor can help you identify habits that may impede growth and understand your interpersonal tendencies.

On a relationship level, your counselor can help you recover trust between you and your partner, gain respect for each other, encourage intimacy between you and your partner, and foster communication within your relationship.

Other styles of treatment include intensives and retreats; intensives mitigate the distractions caused by breaks in sessions, which causes interruptions in progress. With retreat-style intensives, issues that you would like to discuss receive the time required to address adequately; time does not become a constraint to progress if certain issues require more time than others. In addition, retreats allow couples to completely unplug from other responsibilities and endeavors, allowing 100% focus on their relationship. Couples can indulge in intimate activities including romantic meals, massages, activities (pottery making or horseback riding), and sexual exploration, etc. in tandem with traditional therapeutic work allowing for intensive, progressive work towards their relationship goals.

This question originally appeared on Quora.

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